So, what are YOU doing for Pesach?  I'm sure you've thought about it already and maybe just have been avoiding the topic..,..right?

This will be my first year "making" Pesach.  That means real cleaning, real cooking and real hosting.  Wow, I am so excited at the opportunity to finally be doing my own Pesach instead of having to be a guest in my parents' home or my in-laws' home.  At the same time, though I am so nervous.  I always have the intention of getting things like this organized before the date.  I want to have a peaceful yom tov. But at the same time I know that organization is seriously not my strong point and time management is especially not my strong point.  I also realize that the very nature of Pesach is so hectic and time consuming and that having a lot of people will be all at once enjoyable and overwhelming.  

So how will I get through the preparations of Pesach that loom before me without feeling like I'm ready to throw in the towel?  How will I manage to enjoy my family, the yom tov and still get things done?  How will I organize everything I need to buy, do, clean, cook, and then prepare?  Not only will I be making Pesach, but I will also be hosting the Seders for our family.  

I am so excited and to start that is a great thing!  I just have to keep that exciting energy at the forefront of my mind while I am in the middle of all the heavy duty stuff and remember that even though we are bound to spend soooo much money, even with trying to save money, it will all be worth it, and it's gotta be in G-d's plan somewhere!

So here are a few things that I've made a list of.  One list is the items I don't own yet that I need to buy ( not including food) and the other is a beginning list of things to remember to clean which I actually made from last year when we had to clean some stuff since we  were living at my in-laws' when they made Pesach:

I'm sure I'll think of more things as time goes by but I am pretty happy with this list.  I think the next step is to make a timeline so I can accomplish the things that have to be done.

Please comment about what YOUR Pesach plans are and if you have any other tips or advice for a rookie Pesach maker! :)

When do you get time to sit and learn? Or even if you do have time, do you want to sit and learn?  Can you concentrate on learning new Torah ideas and words of inspiration?

I don't really have any classes that I attend but lately I've been making an effort to fill my mind with Torah thoughts once in a while by reading something about the weekly Torah portion, or learning with a friend every other week.  With so many things going on throughout my week, it really is a challenge to sit down and take a class seriously or work on paying attention to a new concept for long stretches of time.  My brain can only focus in short stints. :\

Last night I was at my in laws' Shabbos table and my father in law shared something very simple and yet quite practical and to the point.  This week's parsha Vayakhel speaks about the building of the Mishkan (temporary Dwelling place, aka mini temple used in the desert during the Jews' travels).  It gives details about what items were brought and how they went about the construction of the Mishkan on a regular basis.  Since the Jewish people were sojourning throughout the desert for 40 years and would have to construct it and deconstruct it whenever they traveled from place to place, they had to know what they were doing.  But a question arises about why it's necessary to repeat this information because these details were actually already mentioned a couple of weeks ago.  Why have to repeat itself in the Torah?  And anyway, couldn't G-d just have easily done all the work Himself and not bothered to give such tedious details and instructions to a bunch of people who may have a large margin for error?

The answer is simply that to G-d, our effort and participation was paramount.  G-d isn't interested in doing everything Himself.  I mean, yeah we would get the point and everything about His Omnipotence but then what?  

I was actually reading a book to Mushky tonight before bedtime called "All About Us" by Dina Rosenfeld, which is published by HaChai Publishing.  It's a really sweet book all about the different parts of our body and how G-d gave us each part so we can do Mitzvos (Torah Commandments) with them.  But at the beginning of the book there is a beautiful quote which ties in with this message above:  "Once upon a time, there was only Hashem (G-d) and His Torah, alone in His world.  But Hashem was not finished.    Hashem said, 'I want someone to learn my Torah.  I want someone to do my mitzvos.  It is time for Me to make people.'"

G-d could do whatever He wanted, but in the end, He chose to create us to connect with Him, to connect with His Torah, and to connect with each other.  

As moms, I think this is great to remember.  Yes, we have so many to-do lists, and such a wide variety of responsibilities.  Sometimes we just want someone else to take over.  Sometimes we just want G-d to figure it out for us and not leave us with so many decisions and duties.  

But in the end, G-d really loves when we take over and be a  part of the solution.  When we take the initiative to get our acts together, bring our attitudes to a higher more positive level, connect deeper with our kids and our husbands, and create new experiences for our family.  We are given so much power as mothers and G-d has the full confidence in us to use our talents and unique qualities to actualize our potential in every role we play in life.  How empowering!  As I write this, it's actually exciting me to think that I have so much to offer and am so capable.  

And guess what?  YOU are powerful, amazing, smart, and ever so capable!  YOU are YOU! YOU are a MOM!

Keep up the good work!  G-d is so happy to be a partner with you and THANK YOU! (In case no one said that to you yet today :))

Today is President's day.   I was thinking about how it's so interesting that the celebration of President's Day means a day off of school.  I hardly think that the Presidents of old would want us to celebrate it by skipping out on an opportunity to learn, but hey, why not have another day off?!   When I was explaining to my daughter about why she doesn't have school today, I couldn't really explain it properly and in the end she thought I said "presents day" and is expecting to be taken shopping at the dollar store instead.  Perhaps instead we can use the day to instill a knowledge of  Hashem - G-d - in our children, since the founding fathers were religious and believers in Monotheism, talking about treating friends and strangers with respect and kindness.... or maybe instead it would be a good idea to explain more about rights for different people or the Constitution.  Something!  But instead of displaying a thesis here on how to best celebrate President's Day, I went ahead and collected some interesting facts about our Presidents.  
Happy Presents Day!!!

1.     Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865) is the only U.S. president who was also a licensed bartender. He was co-owner of Berry and Lincoln, a saloon in Springfield, Illinois.

2.     The only president to be unanimously elected was George Washington (1732-1799). He also refused to accept his presidential salary, which was $25,000 a year.

3.     Because the KKK was a powerful political force, Truman was encouraged to join the organization. According to some accounts, he was inducted, though he was “never active.” Other accounts claim that though he gave the KKK a $10 membership fee, he demanded it back and was never inducted or initiated.

4.     Grover Cleveland was the only president in history to hold the job of a hangman. He was once the sheriff of Erie County, New York, and twice had to spring the trap at a hanging.

5.     The “S” in Harry S Truman doesn’t stand for anything; therefore, there is no period after his middle initial.

6.     Lincoln Logs are named after Abraham Lincoln and the log cabin where he was born. John Lloyd Wright, son of famous architect Francis Lloyd Wright, invented them.

7.     Thomas Jefferson and John Adams once traveled to Stratford-upon-Avon to visit Shakespeare’s birthplace. While there, they took a knife to one of Shakespeare’s chairs so they could take home some wood chips as souvenirs.

8.     James Madison and Thomas Jefferson were once arrested together for taking a carriage ride in the countryside of Vermont on a Sunday, which violated the laws of that state.

9.     Andrew Johnson is the only tailor ever to be president. As president, he would typically stop by a tailor shop to say hello. He would wear only the suits that he made himself.

10.   “Teddy Bears” were so named when Theodore “Teddy” Roosevelt (1858-1919) refused to shoot a small bear cub one day. The incident was reported in the news, which inspired a toy manufacture to come out with the cute stuffed animals.

http://facts.randomhistory.com/interesting-facts-about-us-presidents.html

Okay, well now that I've voiced my griping about making food, when push comes to shove, we all do have to eat and I am all for quick and nutritious food.  I also strive to create meals that are super quick and that you can make on the fly either just for yourself when you need that pre-dinner food or for an actual family meal.  One of my all time favorite foods is cheese.  The problem is that as although cheese is a great source of protein, you really need to eat something other than cheese to make it 'healthy'.  Plus, as soon as any of us gets sick I am very reticent to feed it to anyone in the family because it just makes us more stuffy and creates an excess need of tissues (if you know what I mean) :)

But  I still love cheese.  However on those days when we can't have an overload of it, I've started substituting it sometimes with the Pareve alternative called "Daiya" which is pretty good actually and melts okay.  I just can't have a whole chunk of it, it needs to be mixed with other stuff.  So for those of you who may be vegan or on non-dairy diets, feel free to play around with this idea and substitute.  This also works for non-gluten ppl because you can use corn or rice flour tortillas instead of flour tortillas (which is what I prefer anyway).

QUESADILLA:

Makes one per adult and you can make the same in a smaller version if you use corn tortillas for kids.  I don't really measure ingredients so what I write below may be a bit too much but you'll see when you make it.

Two rice tortillas
1/4-1/2 c. shredded cheese
1/2 sliced avocado
1 lime
1/4 tsp. mexican seasoning (most likely you'll find this in Whole Foods or a "natural" store)
1/4 c. black or navy beans
slices of 1 tomato - thin
salsa

Put a small amount of cheese on top of first tortilla and then pile with beans, avocado, tomato, lime juice and seasoning and then put the rest of the cheese over that and then the tortilla on top of that.  Bake at 350 in your milchig oven (or regular one, if you are using pareve cheese)..  I usually flip it over after 5 or so minutes.

Enjoy with some salsa on top!

Okay, so I know that it's really good to be positive and everything but I'd like to keep this blog honest and honesty does not always lead to positivity (although in the end it might).  So, my honesty of the day is that I think I hate making dinners.  I am the kind of person  that loves to snack, loves breakfast food and although I am actually pretty creative in the kitchen, I really can't stand the idea of dinner.  Thinking back to life growing up, since I'm an only child, I didn't really have a sit down dinner time.  We kind of ate when we were hungry and most of the time we ate on the couch watching some TV or movie.  It doesn't sound so family conducive but it worked for us then and  I don't mind the idea overall, except that once you have more than one kid, you kind of have to be more organized and settled about it and plus we don't have a TV and I believe that dinner time is great for sitting all together.

So, the problem is COOKING  dinner.  I really can't stand it.  I mean the I've planned dinner menus, done the whole grocery list for those dinners, tried doing the same thing every Monday and Tuesday idea, and it just isn't working for me.  I don't like dinners. The thing is I get bored of these food ideas.  I just blank out once I start "menu planning" and even when I do menu plan, the food never looks appetizing.  I like to cook on the fly.  But that isn't really practical cuz then I either won't have time to make what I suddenly want to eat, or I may not have the ingredients.

So here I am now opting for toast pizza and just reaching out to all those moms out there like me who still haven't quite figured out the whole dinner deal.  Please feel free to comment on any pointers that you've found useful and effective in your routine.

Happy Dinner Time!

Since this is a blog for moms, it would definitely be lacking if it didn't involve some element of food.  There's the old saying, "Home is Where the Heart Is" which I recently saw re-written as "Home is Where Mom Is" but in the end, the yummy food is what unites our hearts, our moms and our homes!
Not all mom's love to cook, granted, but most moms and most people for that matter, love to eat!  Between cooking for my family, getting pregnant, having cravings, then nursing and being starving all the time, food has basically become a central point in my life.    I am a very strong believer in making things, even recipE that officially call for separating wet and dry ingredients, in ONE BOWL!  Who wants to do dishes, or even look at a mess once you finish eating, when all you want to do is actually enjoy whatever it is you just made.  
Here is a really simple one bowl recipe that is a great, relatively low sugar breakfast or replacement for cookies.  Courtesy of my mom and one of her good friends.
1 1/4 c. flour - whole wheat, sprouted wheat, spelt, or white1/4 c. oat bran1/3 c. sugar - or 3 T-1/4 c. Truvia2 c. old fashioned oats4 tsp. baking powder1/4 heaping tsp. salt1/3 c. dried cranberries, nuts, currants, blueberries, or whatever :)  Also good with chopped peeled apple and a hint of cinnamon
Mix all of the above ingredients and make a well in the middle
Then add:
1 whole egg, slightly beaten1/2 c. grapeseed oil or margarine (oil is easier cuz you don't have to wait for it to get soft)1/4 c. almond milk or soy milk
Mix all ingredients well until it forms a sort of dough. Turn oven onto 425 degrees.  Then line two cookie sheets with parchment paper or oiled foil, and split the dough in half and flatten into circles about 1/2 " thick on each cookie sheet and score into 8 slices like a pizza pie
Bake for 16-20 minutes depending on how good of an oven you have!
Freezes well and is really tasty warm with some butter or margarine spread on top and served with a glass of your favorite tea or coffee!

So my boss, as an end of the year present, gave all of us on the team the book "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie, which is basically a self-help classic originally written in the 30's and still extremely relevant today.  I have started to read it and came upon a most impressive and moving essay that was actually re-printed with the author's permission.  It is so relevant to the trials of every mother and father in regards to their children and is included within the chapter about not giving criticism.  Since I'll be quoting the entire passage here, I hope it will be okay with the authors (both of which are either very old or no longer alive so I couldn't ask permission to reprint anyway).  I copied this from another site instead of having to retype the whole thing, so I'm assuming there aren't any mistakes in content.


FATHER FORGETS
W. Livingston Larned

Listen, son; I am saying this as you lie asleep, one little paw crumpled under your cheek and the blond curls stickily wet on your damp forehead. I have stolen into your room alone. Just a few minutes ago, as I sat reading my paper in the library, a stifling wave of remorse swept over me. Guiltily I came to your bedside.

There are things I was thinking, son: I had been cross to you. I scolded you as you were dressing for school because you gave your face merely a dab with a towel. I took you to task for not cleaning your shoes. I called out angrily when you threw some of your things on the floor.
At breakfast I found fault, too. You spilled things. You gulped down your food. You put your elbows on the table. You spread butter too thick on your bread. And as you started off to play and I made for my train, you turned and waved a hand and called, "Goodbye, Daddy!" and I frowned, and said in reply, "Hold your shoulders back!"

Then it began all over again in the late afternoon. As I came Up the road, I spied you, down on your knees, playing marbles. There were holes in your stockings. I humiliated you before you boyfriends by marching you ahead of me to the house. Stockings were expensive - and if you had to buy them you would be more careful! Imagine that, son, form a father!

Do you remember, later, when I was reading in the library, how you came in timidly, with a sort of hurt look in your eyes? When I glanced up over my paper, impatient at the interruption, you hesitated at the door. "What is it you want?" I snapped.

You said nothing, but ran across in one tempestuous plunge, and threw your arms around my neck and kissed me, and your small arms tightened with an affection that God had set blooming in your heart and which even neglect could not wither. And then you were gone, pattering up the stairs.

Well, son, it was shortly afterwards that my paper slipped from my hands and a terrible sickening fear came over me. What has habit been doing to me? The habit of finding fault, of reprimanding - this was my reward to your for being a boy. It was not that I did not love you; it was that I expected too much of youth. I was measuring you by the yardstick of my own years.

And there was so much that was good and fine and true in your character. The little heart of you was as big as the dawn itself over the wide hills. This was shown by your spontaneous impulse to rush in and kiss me good night. Nothing else matters tonight, son. I have come to your bedside in the darkness, and I have knelt there, ashamed!

It is a feeble atonement; I know you would not understand these things if I told them to you during your waking hours. But tomorrow I will be a real daddy! I will chum with you, and suffer when you suffer, and laugh when you laugh. I will bite my tongue when impatient words come. I will keep saying as if it were a ritual: "He is nothing buy a boy - a little boy!"

I am afraid I have visualized you as a man. Yet as I see you now, son, crumpled and weary in your cot, I see that you are still a baby. Yesterday you were in your mother's arms, your head on her shoulder. I have asked too much, too much."

Above is the end of the essay.  In Carnegie's book, he continues with the following:

"Instead of condemning people, let's try to understand them.  Let's try to figure out why they do what they do.  That's a lot more profitable and intriguing than criticism; and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and kindness. 'To know all is to forgive all.'
As Dr. Johnson said: 'G-d himself, sir, does not propose to judge man until the end of his days.' Why should you and I?"

- How to Win Friends and Influence People, pgs. 14-16

This totally speaks for itself and although it is in one way, a sad story of a father who's not treated his son the right way, we all know that this happens so often, and in a way who can blame us, right?  I mean I definitely don't want to take responsibility for the times I've behaved this way to my daughter since I'm always busy at that moment and she always happens to be doing something annoying or wrong....Right?

Well, I guess the lesson is: WRONG!  My daughter is only a little girl and I have to know what that means and what it doesn't mean and not look for fault in places that I will find it, but wrongfully so.  My grandmother, may her memory be a blessing, told me some of the wisest words ever before she passed away.  They echo these very thoughts above and although I will not quote them because they are special and private memory to me, I know that I can trust her words, because she was so very wise.  The point is, let's know what we can truly expect of our children, and for that matter of ourselves as well.  Let our best friends be ourselves and our family and be the kindest and most forgiving of them, instead of the most judgemental and critical.

Have a beautiful Sunday!